I’ll tell them you went down prying the wedding ring off his cold, dead finger. Well, thanks to the Internet. Is there a place on the web that panders to my lust for violence? Ah, the ‹Breakfast Club› soundtrack! I can’t wait til I’m old enough to feel ways about stuff! But existing is basically all […]
Category: Daily
And then the battle’s not so bad? Yeah, lots of people did. Oh, I don’t have time for this. I have to go and buy a single piece of fruit with a coupon and then return it, making people wait behind me while I complain. I had more, but you go ahead. Tell her she […]
For one beautiful night I knew what it was like to be a grandmother. Subjugated, yet honored. We’re rescuing ya. You’re going to do his laundry? I had more, but you go ahead. I’m just glad my fat, ugly mama isn’t alive to see this day. I guess if you want children beaten, you have to […]
And yet you haven’t said what I told you to say! How can any of us trust you? We’ll go deliver this crate like professionals, and then we’ll go home. You can see how I lived before I met you. No, I’m Santa Claus! You mean while I’m sleeping in it? I am Singing Wind, Chief […]
Nay, I respect and admire Harold Zoid too much to beat him to death with his own Oscar. Eeeee! Now say «nuclear wessels»! This is the worst kind of discrimination: the kind against me! There, now he’s trapped in a book I wrote: a crummy world of plot holes and spelling errors! I didn’t ask […]